Best Worst Date Ever

I have had many bad dates in my years of dating but the date I had Saturday night will forever hold the place as the worst date in history.

Let's start at the beginning. It began on Thursday night when he tricked me into giving him my phone number. He asked for my cell phone and I thought he was just putting his number into my phone. Well no, he called his phone from my phone, thus recording my number into his caller ID. I found it amusing and harmless.

So on Saturday night we actually talked on the phone. I had no plans that evening and since I figured I needed dating practice, I agreed to meet him for dinner.

What did I learn from him during dinner? First, I still am not sure what he does for employment. Claiming to be a casting agent, he had great difficulty explaining his job to me. He did explain that before the housing crisis he made lots and lots of money as a loan officer. However, he no longer had such money. I am assuming it was lost in what he later described as his bad gambling addiction. Yes, he shared that he use to go to Vegas a few times a month with an ex-girlfriend and run thru thousands of dollars at blackjack.

He later went on to share that his goal wasn't to save money but to make hundreds of thousands of dollars at one time. He said that the first step to this Road to Riches was to first visualize himself with luxury items. He said he was doing this by calling expensive hotels and car dealerships and pretending to be in the market for such items, requesting price information. He even said he called a private jet company once for a price quote to fly him and a few friends to the Caribbean for the weekend.

I sat at dinner listening to this conversation and found it very difficult to keep straight face.

Then the bill came. It sat on the table far longer than it should have. Then he picked it up, looked at it for a few minutes, went through his wallet and asked, "Do you have ten dollars?" To which I in my best black woman attitude voice told him "no." He paid with his credit card and made up some excuse about how he didn't want to use his credit card. Whatever!

The waiter bought his card back for him to sign the receipt and he stepped away to go to the bathroom. His leaving concerned me, as it would most people at this point, so I proceeded to look at the credit card to see what name was on it. Well the card said, "H&R Block Client." My girlfriend later told me that this was likely his tax refund.

He returns from the bathroom and asks if I would like to go somewhere for a drink and to shoot a few games of pool. I had enough at this point so I politely declined the invitation.

As if the date couldn't get any worse, as he walked me to my car, I asked him where his car was parked to which he proudly proclaimed, "I don't have a car. I was dropped off."

Thank you loser guy!!! You were so kind to not only buy me dinner, but you also provided me something far more valuable. A story that I will be telling for the rest of my life.